The inner critic. We are all familiar this part of ourselves that seems to speak without permission. It brings us into the shadows, revealing those parts that are hard to be with. In my experience, there can be two ways to relate to the inner critic. One: let it beat me up and wallow in a puddle of “I must be a horrible person”. Two: deeply listen to the inner critic, knowing it is illuminating areas of growth through the words of criticism it speaks.
Recently, my inner critic became loud and clear in an area of my life that was lacking in awareness. I found myself, once again in a familiar old cycle of people coming and going whenever they felt like it and showing up or not. At first I was angry at myself. How could I let this happen again? How could I let myself step in the trap of people leaving in times that are challenging? And! Let it affect me so deeply. Especially since it has been something I have been working so hard on. As I sat in the discomfort of it all, and my eyes opened to trusting that this inner critic had something of value to say. It was shining the spotlight to illuminate a new way to be in. The spotlight fully lit up that part of myself to see that I am enough, and to fully believe that I am enough. Not when this happens or when I do this thing. Right now. As I am. I am enough. Regardless of who chooses to be in my life or not.
Taking a deep breath into fully surrendering into “I am enough”, the inner critic silenced. In this moment, I knew the gift the inner critic had brought into my life. The gift of seeing that I was making choices from a place of “not being enough” until I become/accomplished A, B, C, etc. This, gave me the choice to now come from a place of “I am enough” and to be empowered to make choices from here instead.
There are times to deeply listen to our inner critics, and to come into healthy relationship with it. Knowing it has a place and a time when in healthy balance, illuminating the beauty behind the criticism.